The Lost Art of Theatre Etiquette

Just returned from a wonderful live theatre production by a local group of professional actors. Unfortunately, the entire experience was almost overshadowed by some inapporpriate (and at times unbelievable) audience behavior. Since our company specializes in trips to see the best of Broadway, perhaps it’s time for a quick refresher course on what you should (and shouldn’t) do when attending a show. Before reading, make sure your tongue is planted firmly in cheek.

TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONES AND OTHER ELECTRONIC DEVICES – Yes, most theatres make an announcement about this prior to the show, but really, shouldn’t it be common sense? Oh, and while we’re at it, I mean OFF, not vibrate, not low volume ringing…OFF. Yes, I can hear your phone vibrating in your purse during the most emotional moment of the show. If you can’t be away from your electronic toys for two to three hours at a time, just stay home.

NO PHOTOGRAPHY OF ANY KIND – Another thing they usually announce, but it seems that some people think, “Oh, that doesn’t apply to me.” There are a million reasons not to do it (it’s distracting to the actors and the people around you) but quite frankly, if the theatre says no, then you should respect that.

NO TALKING – Yes, we all know that’s (insert famous actor) and he/she was in (insert favorite movie). You don’t need to tell us when they come on stage. We have a Playbill and have access to the same information. Yes, that was a funny joke. We heard it. No need to repeat it. The plot is confusing? That’s why we’ve conveniently scheduled an intermission so we can catch you up. Talking is WELCOMED during the intermission and after the final curtain. But no matter how quiet you think you’re being, you’re not. So don’t talk — at all. No whispering…nothing.

NO EATING OR DRINKING – Unfortunately, some theatres have started allowing food and drinks in the seating areas. Even so, don’t do it. Ice rattling around in a cup is distracting, not to mention the LOUD wrappers on your candy and chips. The cell phone rule also applies here – if you can’t wait 2-3 hours to eat, then stay home. Or even better – go to a restaurant, where you can talk, have your phone on and do all the other annoying things that you shouldn’t be doing here.

DON’T RUN FOR THE EXIT WHEN THE FINAL SONG ENDS – Maybe you didn’t notice, but 50-60 people, including actors, musicians and backstage workers just put on an exhausting show for you. Sure, you paid for a ticket, but they deserve some respect. How about a little clapping? Really, you can’t spare an extra 2-3 minutes to thank them? Even if you didn’t like the show, leaving is rude and yes, they can SEE you. Maybe, out of respect, you should just stand there in silence. Your car will still be in the parking lot. Oh, yes, I forgot — traffic. Well, I refer you to #1 and #4 – stay home.

SHOW UP ON TIME – OR EVEN BETTER – EARLY – Unlike the movies, there are no previews or commercials before a live show. If it says 8pm on the ticket, you can bet it will start close to that time. Everyone else made it on time, so really you have no excuse. Leave the house earlier. Skip dessert at the restaurant. But whatever you do, get there on time. There’s nothing worse than a whole row of people (not to mention the hundreds of people behind them) getting distracted because YOU can’t be on time. I’d support fully a NO LATE SEATING policy. I rarely arrive before half-hour (30 minutes prior to curtain) and usually arrive an hour early. Most facilities have bars and restaurants. Oh – and chairs. So get there early and relax. Maybe they’ll give you something free to read while you’re waiting. Or perhaps you could go to the bathroom, so you don’t have to…

LEAVING DURING A PERFORMANCE – Getting up to get another beer is fine at the ballpark but not cool at the theatre. You should only leave the auditorium in an extreme emergency (checking your Facebook doesn’t count) and you should expect that you may not be let back in until a suitable break in the show. I once saw “Phantom of the Opera” on a sunny afternoon in Houston. People were coming and going throughout the usually darkly-lit show and each time the doors opened, the arena and stage were both flooded with light. It ruined the effect and the show overall.

THINK ABOUT YOUR FELLOW AUDIENCE MEMBERS – This should be a basic life lesson – stop thinking just about yourself and consider others. How is my behavior affecting those around me? Am I too loud? Am I fidgiting too much? I honestly think that some people don’t realize that they are being distracting or rude, but if they simply looked at it from afar, they’d see it and be completely embarrassed.

Seems so simple, doesn’t it? Most of this stuff is simple common sense. If everyone would try to live by these suggestions, live theatre would be an even more amazing experience. But there are a few other suggestions to remember – the things you SHOULD do.

ENJOY THE SHOW – Relax and let the pros entertain you. By turning off the phone, not talking and not eating, you’re completely free to escape from the real world for a few hours.

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ARE ENCOURAGED – If you’re amused, let that laugh out. Enjoy that song or performance? Loud applause is completely appropriate and quite frankly, the best compliment the actors can get.

TELL YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT THE SHOW – Live theatre is a unique art form. Many people who have never been to a Broadway show have misconceptions that have kept them from attending. Tell them how much fun they’ll have or even better, take them to a show. You’ll be helping to promote a great American tradition and you’ll both have a wonderful time.

So the next time you hear that announcement right before the curtain goes up, remember: Yes, these rules apply to me. Now where is that cell phone?